I want to learn to be a troll. I picked Troll originally because it seemed most fun, but clearly, if you’ve read my attempts on these forums, I don’t know how. I would like some lessons.

I know trolling doesn’t simply involving calling people “fabulous persons” or “fine upstanding member of societys”; those are just accurate descriptions of the poster and so don’t insult them. There’s an art (not emo kid art) to it and I’m hoping to pick up some general tips and possibly apprentice to a master. Could anyone who knows how to troll please teach me?

MC Banhammer Posted:

I want to learn to be a troll. I picked Troll originally because it seemed most fun, but clearly, if you’ve read my attempts on these forums, I don’t know how. I would like some lessons.

I know trolling doesn’t simply involving calling people “fabulous persons” or “fine upstanding member of societys”; those are just accurate descriptions of the poster and so don’t insult them. There’s an art (not emo kid art) to it and I’m hoping to pick up some general tips and possibly apprentice to a master. Could anyone who knows how to troll please teach me?

1. be a mean person

2. speak your mind

3. don’t be a fabulous person head

I don’t claim to be an epic troll or anything, but to be a good one all you really need to do is make the other person feel like they are making you look stupid, when in reality they are failing epicly.

see: http://www.forumwarz.com/discussions/view/6301

According to the most accomplished upcoming troll on these, the ForumWarz forums for discussion of things relating to ForumWarz (and other topics, in the specified subforums), the prime directive you are required to follow for successful trolling is to be as verbose as humanly possible in order to prove to all posters who cannot follow your over-complicated prose that you are extremely intelligent compared to them and so there is no use arguing against you; a mere 3-page exposition on their flaws should be sufficient to prove your victory in all flamewars with them past, present, future, and indeed in any other time periods yet to be described that those three designations do not encompbum by definition. It is completely and positively unnecessary to follow established rules and regulations for ejaculating thoughts in coherent sentences provided your posted ASCII is comprised of a veritable baker’s dozen of “ten dollar words”, to use an expression rather more suited to commoners than aristocratic and scholarly contributors as we happen to be.

MC Banhammer Posted:

@Paraone: I do that all the time. Am I already a troll?

yea

FAIL Posted:

I don’t claim to be an epic troll or anything, but to be a good one all you really need to do is make the other person feel like they are making you look stupid, when in reality they are failing epicly.

see: http://www.forumwarz.com/discussions/view/6301

It was very brave and noble of you to put yourself up as an example of falling to that technique.

Act like your mom does in the days before her poontang cries the red tears. If yer mom is dead, act like the person that killed her. Especially if it was cancer. Cancer is a **** of a troll.

OP IZ DA NOOB

HE SUXXORZ AT TROLLING

But anyway. I define a troll as someone who does things for the sole reason of ****ing others off. While calling someone a fabulous person fine upstanding member of society isn’t necessarily successful trolling, calling someone a fabulous person fine upstanding member of society when it’s sure to get their backs up is.

A successful troll builds up hatred, then feeds upon it. Instead of making one big troll post, make lots of little ones. The successful troll is the boil upon the bum of a forum. Wherever there are decent topics, the troll is there to derail them and then dance upon the still-warm wreckage.

spend a week on /b/